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Streetcorner Symphony
By Rob Thomas
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single, have a son nicknamed "Bug" and two awesome dogs, Sawyer Brown who's a chocolate lab and Emma Dilemma whom we adopted and she's a black lab. I love music, movies and Murdock! hee hee

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Tuesday, January 16, 2007

This post is dedicated to Lee Ann, Dixie Hoochie, the birthday girl.




Walking into the bar, Tony said to Vinny the bartender, "Pour me a stiff one - just had another fight with Lee Ann."

"Oh yeah?" said Vinny, "And how did this one end?"

"When it was over," Tony replied, "She came to me on her hands and knees".

"Really," said Vinny, "Now that's a switch! What did she say?"

She said, "Come out from under the bed, you big chicken."

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Some of the artists of the 60's are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby boomers like yourself.

They include:

Ringo Starr--- I Get By With a Little Help From Depends

The Bee Gees--- How Can You Mend a Broken Hip

Bobby Darin--- Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' a Flash

Johnny Nash--- I Can't See Clearly Now

Paul Simon--- Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver

The Commodores--- Once, Twice, Three Times to the Bathroom

Marvin Gaye--- Heard It Through the Grape Nuts

Leo Sayer--- You Make Me Feel Like Napping

The Temptations--- Papa's Got a Kidney Stone

Abba--- Denture Queen.

Helen Reddy--- I Am Woman, Hear Me Snore

Willie Nelson--- On the Commode Again

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An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.

He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?"

"Just water," says the priest.

The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?"

The priest looks at the bottle and says, "Good Lord! He's done it again!"

------------------------------------------------

So Lee Ann I leave you with some advice. Old age is like a bank account. You withdraw from what you've put in. So my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories! Thank you for your part in filling my memory bank sweetie, your such a joy, hugs! Have an awesome day!

Comments on ""

 

Blogger Dixiechick said ... (January 17, 2007 at 10:09 AM) : 

Oh Mary, Mary... I LOVE IT!!!!! THANK YOU!!! I'm sitting here with tears streaming down my face I'm laughing so hard. I love you and can't wait to meet you in B'ham.... Thanks for making my birthday special!

 

Blogger Maryfly said ... (January 17, 2007 at 11:18 AM) : 

ahhhhh, thanks and I'm so glad you liked it!

by the time were done with B'ham there gonna have us outlawed from there.

much love

 

Blogger Bond said ... (January 17, 2007 at 11:26 AM) : 

bwahahahahaahahahahaahahahahahahaha

 

Blogger Piacere said ... (January 17, 2007 at 12:14 PM) : 

BAD TO THE BONE!!! Hilarious stuff there, Miss Fly!! (BTW, our priest LURVES that wine joke!!) HSG!!!

 

Blogger Turnbaby said ... (January 17, 2007 at 11:06 PM) : 

LOLOL OMG--They are gonna have to call in the Special Forces WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

Blogger Maryfly said ... (January 18, 2007 at 9:44 AM) : 

yes they will Turnberrybaby!

LOL Pia! and quoting Mr. Thorogood, very cool

 

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